Demon Friend

File Location: My Words/Completion (What we know)/Achieving Awareness/Methodology/Methods/Demon Friend

I decided ti typoe this one up beecause it helped me once and I used it again after that,dff

The purpose of  this thinking  is to be able to lessen the reality of certain prejudices.  Or thats what I used it for,

The way that I came up with this method, I think, is more important to consider.  I was just all over a problem trying to figure out a way to let go of my closedness to open my mind, and I was just thinknig  of different things just using my imagination, and so this came up and it was pretty effective.

So what I did, I had these prejudices and they were bothering me and  know that I am suppose open my mind and believe less of what was on my mind and remember and think of thinggs that countered it (which I am not really able to do in a closed state of mind).

(Read October 25, 2009)

So I started thinking of the state I was in and a wa ro explain it or to describe it, my mind wasl closed  and I blamed it on a demon taunting me with ideas, telling me, convincing me that these were true, juust making me feel as if they were real over and over again, no mater how much I wanted to get rid  of them, to open my mind, to think of other possibilities for some reason I just cant.

So I blamed it on a demon, nad he was taunting me and tlling me these thngs, so I wresteld with him, and I laughed, and ... well I thinnk I wrote this in my diary and I  think it was about the time that I dont know maybe it was when the radio was shut off in the dishroom and I was unreasonably upset, and then I made friends with the demon, so that we got along and so he didnt really tell me anything.

Today at the fall conference, we worshipped and I really was feeling oppressed, because Krystina and this other girl her housemate or something was there so it remind me of the time when I went in and they told me to get out, how they rejected me, and how these things kept me from expressing myself aoround them, they never cleared things up with me, they made me cry so I felt intimidated, and just lie they didnt want me to be there (even though they said hi to me) nothing was fixed...

Andso I thought about how everyone else judges me and what not, just a bunch of things,

So I remembered the demon, and I told him we could be friends, and he still kept telling me these things, but it was okay now cuz he is just my friend, and he jokes around like that (we both have heacy humor so I understand), so I didnt make much of what he was telling me so there I was, and I knew that my interpretations and my oppression and prejudices about the world and what people thought of me, and how I should get back at them and what I should do for them to feel sorry or to regret their closed mindedness, and the plans I had so they wouldnt think I had a good time at the fall conference, all these things I already considered to be false, and I had alrady wanted to open my mind to others, but I just couldnt, even though I knew there could be better and moore open thoughts...

Untill I saw alll of these beliefs as jokes from my  demon friend... then I was able to disregard them as jokes.. because they were jokes, I mean cmon....

I dont know how the dynamics of this works, but I think  that for it to work and so that it seems that these beliefs are “jokes”  from a heavy humored demon, then honest observations from a trusted imaginary friend; I think I already had to know that there was more to believe and I already had in my mind that what I interpret from reality and from events and observations, isnt always the only, or even truth. 

So yea...

If I can explain this more or see away to elaborate on this method or explain it Ill add.