Whitman College: the darkness that was once hidden in the deep corners of my mind is now spread out, and is as intense as I ever fought it. In times of pain one is displaying the strength, will, and stubbornness of the inner spirit, to be willing to live through such bewildering horror.
During Prayer:
God: when you focus my presence upon such, what do you see?
I: I see that things are as they are, whatever they may be, not as may think. Since you are all-knowing and ever-present, so all I see can be known, and their every aspect presently felt.
God: Just as you say, I also Am in the essence of your soul.
I: We are so connected, it is like we are one, I am your breath.
God: what else can you see in Me?
I: All-Powerful
God: So am I in everything around you, can you see this in yourself as well?
I am looking for a symbol, that makes me decide that it’s time to move on, to allow myself to move on; but (1) I don’t trust “symbols” (methods), which means that the change will only be temporary if I do decide to follow it, (2) I think that any “symbol” that prompts me to do anything, should be as ever-present as my actions will have to be. Whatever the case, since I am currently dissatisfied I will keep searching… or maybe I shouldn’t. Anyways!!
Emotions, that go by too quickly, before I detect them. They leave because I choose to get rid of them, just like one eats ice-cream to get rid of a chemical craving, to get rid of a sensation that they interpret as pain.
There are things that we think but we do not consider them to be thoughts because we do not manage to articulate them in a way that we acknowledge its existence. Since we don’t acknowledge its existence it disappears to us, and is forgotten. But the reason why we have this flaw is only because, as fallen beings, we believe that if we don’t acknowledge the existence of certain things then they cannot exist to us.
The fire only burns for as long as there is fuel.
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