October 4, 2010

Wow,

I am really excited about the “workout plan” that Sabbath school teacher organized for us at church this last Sabbath.  Spiritual workout.  Day 1, for my 15 minutes of daily intimate prayer, I plan to do none other but to feel the presence of God as it is, and real; as real as all I see and feel.

I just did it, and I just had to write it down; thus I bothered to explain why I decided to go by this routine.First of all let me just say, how comforting it is to know, and to actually sense that there is a presence that knows all.  And if one wants to take the atheist stance; to sense that all there is, is as is, or knows itself, by being what it is.  I am not getting into whether God cares or helps me or anything, all I am saying is that He knows all; and that in itself brings a sort of satisfaction, to know that Truth is what it is, and no matter what anyone does to hide it, it cannot be corrupted, but it will be what it is.

There are two ways of feeling the presence of God, the “far away” one, and the “here” one.

Like when we read stories or fairy tales, we don’t think any of it is real, we do not feel the presence of such events as we do when we read about current events, or a letter from someone.

This is, as I mentioned before, disconnection between imagination and reality; and now, as I think I have mentioned before, I understand that I usually do my thinking, in the imaginary world, in the world where I think, “well it could be like that, but it isn’t, and therefore it’s not real”, I leave everything in a realm that my leaving it there says that whatever it is, it is only for flattery, for fancy, not worth anything, disposable, and after I find the answer, it can be forgotten.  That’s where my thoughts usually are; but now I think that they should be present, they have authority to be real, as real as they are in my imagination; I should feel them as a current event, as a thing that exists.  This is the disconnection between imagination and reality, we limit our reality by degrading the thoughts that we fantasize.  When we pray to God, we only do it in a hopeful manner; hoping that He will here us; but maybe not.  When we pray we should pray in a manner of certainty; certain that He is here, in the past and in the future, and already knows all that is inside your head.

Connecting thoughts with Reality gives them a certainty value.

Though I see value in this mental exercise, I will reserve only for prayer time, because I have not found a reason that justifies it, and/or I have not compared it to the ethical beliefs about consciousness that I currently have.

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Breakfast with a friend:

She pokes at her eggs and bacon, she doesn’t want to eat them.  She tells me that she needs to get her protein for the day.  I tell her to get soy milk.  She says that she would rather not have those massive amounts of added estrogen in her body.  “Soy milk has estrogen? No wonder I am always having mood swings”.  She responds “Yea, I suggest for you to quit your soymilk consumption if you want to get rid of those female emotions.”  “I don’t know,” I tell her, “I kind of like the idea of having a female inside of me.”