Memory

File Location:  My Words/Completion (What we know)\Achieving Awareness\Methodology\Memory/Memory

                I do not consider myself to have gotten any divine revelation, so the following are not to be considered Truths, but in accordance to my word, they are only assumptions,  assumptions from observations, (the only Real Truth is that there Is).  Since these “laws” are only assumptions, we must keep the fact in mind, and never reject anything new, unless it is inevitable, (unless it is inevitable: if it is inevitable, then you should reject it to experience the side that you would not, a little more... more experience means more Life); and we should Never stop searching for The Greatest Truth of all which is God.  For this reason, none should take my message as given; yes interpretation will be necessary, and yes, it should be multiple interpretations; because even if I say nothing but Truth in my words, the way it is received may not be as efficient.  So we need to look for God by ourselves even if we have guidance, and we must pray that the things I am about to say may serve for growth in Life, so that from the words you are about to hear, whether they are right or wrong, that you may assemble many and Life giving interpretations, may your minds be blessed with True Life.

So before you do anything,and carry on, you must remember the basics.  But even before you remember the basics, you must wonder about memory... WHY do you want to remember and HOW do you go about remembering, and after you answer it, you should ask, what if thereis a better way to remember?

Why: Learn/Remember:  Emotion, when you have passion into what you are doing, you have a drive and you have interest, you have a motive to learn, and so you will learn by your own will.  Not only that but because you are interested you it will have morre of an effect on you.  Keep in mind how things have turned out and the seeming causes, so you can have it for later use, become an expert in reality because the more you learn, the more is the life that is in you.  The more perspectives you have are all the worlds you have conquered.  You have chosen life, now let life be yours, remember everything about life, and never forget anything.  Have life in your mind.  In every case that you are interested in, ask.  Now because forgetting is a prominent problem for human beings, OR because remembering is so important, it is important that you wonder about it. Remember – what good is it to have a great and amazing life, if you dont remember it it would be like you never had it.  If nothing else remember’s it, it would be like they never saw you.  It is important to remember yourself and about others, so that you can have proof that you have lived.  If memories are truly accounts of the past.

How: If sometimes you find it hard to remember things, you should not give up to the fact that you are not able to remember, if you really want to live, you would not leave anything to the forgotten, you would make the effort to keep in mind everything possible, let nothing through you.  Whenever you just cant remember something, dont just let it go, when ever you have the opportunity to be aware of something dont dare to ignore, even when its a “curiosity kills the cat” case, sure you dont want to lose your awareness over gaining a little more, but you must remember that it should not be the case that it is the awareness itself that kills you, in a world where infinity exists in every detail of Reality there will always be a way to obtain a little more awareness without losing your present awareness.

If you want to remember > then you should remember, the more you remember > the more you remember, it makes sense.  According to what we have learned about our bodies is that, the more we use it, the better it gets at doing what it does, if we dont use it, it becomes weaker, so if we want to remember, all we have to do is remember more.  The more you practice remembering, the better you will get at it.  So remember whenever and whatever you can, specially things that are hard to remember like dreams, and what you ate a week ago... (remember, this is to improve your memory and you shold try to remember  things that are hard to remember, if its easy for you to remember your dreams and what you did a week ago, then you should remember things that are hard to remember.)

Keep in mind, as many things as possible, try to be aware of many things at once.

Drink alot of water (for blood to the brain), breathe alot (for oxygen for blood to the brain)

Consume food that are good for memory...

Fire retardant chemicals in mattresses, upholstery, television and computer casings and circuit boards have polybrominated diphenyl ethers, or PBDEs for short, found in a variety of consumer plastics.  Studies have linked PBDEs to learning and memory problems, lowered sperm counts and poor thyroid functioning in rats and mice [source: Underwood]. Other animal studies have indicated that PBDEs could be carcinogenic in humans, but that has not been confirmed

What if: (do research on imporving memory, insert here)

Interest

File Location:  My Words/Completion (What we know)\Achieving Awareness\Methodology\Interest/Interest

For one to make an effort to pay attention, and to wonder about something, first there needs to be interest, something that answers why they should do such a move,  something that catches your attention, but what does something need to have to get your attention? I have mentioned before that anything can be interesting but you must find the right way to look at it?  So the answer to become interested in something is to use your imagination to find a world, a world with such beliefs, a perspective in which a subject looks interesting... to find the right way to look at it.  But the question still remains, what is the right way to look at it? And what makes it the right way (other than achieving interest in an individual)? What is it that causes the interest? And what is interest exactly?

So what comes first, interest or attention?

When I give it my attention, I see that it is interesting, OR because it is in some way interesting, I give it my attention.

The interest comes from you, if you dont want to know, then you are not interested, that doesnt mean that the subject at hand is not interesting.  But sometimes a thing can catch your attention no matter how disinterested you are.  Its startling, no matter how dead you want to be.  This is because of the higher stimulation, (I wrote about situational stimulation and sensual stimulation before I took Davis’ class).  Remember that the more you feel the more it awakens you, it doesnt matter how much your desire is aiming for ignorance and death.  Out bodies are formed so that we cannot ignore the verb(? What about people that meditate and they like are completely out or something).  Anyways, I guess the fact that you cannot ignore higher forms of stimulation, and that it catches your attention, means that you still have some desire or element that  wants to live and feel.  But interest comes from within, when something cathes your attention it is because you are interested in living that much, that something of that magnitude, (classification of magnitude depends on yourself) awakens your senses, and makes you want to feel.  If you have more interest in living, then what ever you classify as  something that will make you live, you will be interested in.  But you can still reject when you fear something, even though it makes you feel, why is there rejection? Is rejection just another stimulation, or is it the result of classifying a subject as something that will not let you live?

So how would one make themself sensitive to smaller stimulations, so that they are interested in smaller stimulations (possibly everything).

The magnitude of the stimulation comes from the classification of the individual, so its not about making oneself sensitive, its about classifying things differently.  So you classify it into something that interests you, if you like harry potter than you see the harry potter version of it... no? Or you classify it as it is, but you try to understand the art in itself; you dont try to pick out what you like from it and make yourself the “herry potter” version of it in your mind.  But you make an effort to consume it as a whole, and you see the art in it, you see the good in it,  you try to understand it as it is, and you understand why to love it, what it makes you feel and in what state of mind you have to be in to enjoy it.

What it is that makes for you a state of mind can be checked in “worlds” file (..\..\..\..\Worlds\Subject Matter (worlds).docx)

:: for something to be interesting it has to have an unknown factor, for you to want to figure it out. But there are things that you dont know and you dont care about... so wats that all about? For something to be interesting, can it only be intricate but not unknown?  For something to be interesting, do I just have to classify it as something that spurs life, that catches my attention and that stimulates me so that I feel? Feel something... feel what?  What is that feeling that I search for when I have a dream to accomplish, that once I reach it, I realize that it is not how I pictured it, unless I look at it with the eyes of when I first dreamt about it, only then I feel as if I have reached a dream, am I still interested even though I am satisfied?

So from all this it seems that interest is not the primary goal. But to find ourselves in interest we must engage in perspectives, but to engage in perspectives we must be interested in living... and so we are forced to live, so we can choose.

So if to engage in perspectives we must be interested in living and vice versa, is there a way that this pattern is self-propelled once you give it a kickstart? Would that not mean that once we are given life we become eternal souls?

I feel something, I wonder what it is, so I am interested.. I wonder about it because I am interested, but where does interest come from? I am interested because I feel it, I feel its essential wonder, the things that I say to “I am not interested” it is because I do not feel its essential wonder, it is dead to me because I dont know it.  and this essential wonder keeps us in interest, until, we forget... but if we remember, we continue to love once again, like the first infatuation.

Does the incentive for interest come from the body?  How do you deal with hunger, if you are full, can you imagine and convince your mind that you are still craving? (no because when you lose the interest (you forget how you felt when you) of being hungry (and the art of eating), you realize other interests that you have forgotten as they were fogged down by hunger.

 Experiment – does the incentive for interest come from the body?  interest comes from an internal desire, a craving of anything, and you reflect it by respond to it in a wrong way, you dont know what you want so you express it in a wrong way, you can become interested in anything, because of the desire of being interested.  (if the incentive for interest comes from the body, that would be bad, because the body is corruptible and as we get old, we may lose that incentive... when we die, of course we will lose it, but how slow will it go away with age?  The more aware you are able to be with your body, the more you are able too feel the essential wonder.  Conclusion: There are things that lower your body’s ability  or desire to feel the essential wonder... (so far no experiment has been done) but the experiment should now answer a different question, does this such action, lower my ability to wonder.

Post conclusion, is there even such thing as lowering ability and desire to wonder? Or is it just that we misinterpret or do not know how to accept or receive the wonders from a particular source other than the things (those that “do not lower your ability to feel essential wonders”)

Essential wonder receptors – we all have them but as are raised to pay attention to only certain things our receptors are only tickled when we pay attention in the manner that we pay attention to those certain things.  But if we open our minds, then we will learn different ways to pay attention, if we are not raised to exclude, descriminate, if we are not taught prejudice, we would accept more ways to pay attention to something, and the wonders would be felt from every direction.  But still, we must consecrate ourselves to the Unknown, asking it for its blessing, to keep us safe as we practice our curiosity, as we avoid the inevitable. 

Now the more senses you have, the more ways you are able to feel essential wonders, you use your senses, you make an to pay attention, you observe the world and you use your imagination to interepret what it means.

Interpretation- because humans live by interpretations, they cannot see facts as they are, the interpretation comes from your mind.

You doont need to be interested in something to wonder about it, you can wonder why its suppose to be interesting, and as you give it your own interpretation, it may be one that initially interests you, if its not, then you should figure out what it really is. 

What it really is? Dont you just mean figure out an interprtation that interests you?

Uhh, yes. But you cant stop there for the sake of Life.

Even if you already found a way, it doesnt matter how best it may seem, you must look for others, whether they are better or worse.  Worse is good because now you know how to work in such conditions, or because now you learn more about the factors that make it go.  Better is good because... its better.

So the conclusion is... Listen

So ones job is to look for as many interpretations as possible, but what distinguishes, and is it correct to discriminate interpretations that are interesting from interpretations that are not? Does degrees in interest exist objectively?

The interpretation is something we make up on our own, the interest that we have in it is what we are able to feel from it.

And when something gets your interest, you must wonder about it and develop a world out of it, something useful, anything of anything.  When ever  we are interested in anything it is our duty to satisfy it, because it is a priviledge and an aadvantage that we must use. If we, as living beings are suppose to explore and rape this life as we love it, we are suppose to stuff ourselves with awareness of the things that interest us and the things that dont, but that still exist.  We are suppose to wonder about as much as we can, and it is just easier when we are interested, so dont let these interests fade.

..\..\Wondering\how to wonder.docx

Whatever you can give your attention to, do it for the sake of awareness.  Whenever you have a chance to observe, something look around

Open Mind

File Location:  My Words/Completion (What we know)\Achieving Awareness\Methodology\Explore\Open Mind/Open Mind

“What is Truth”. And this is why it is important to have an open mind,

Open mind = So I may be wrong... I will listen

Admit that you may be wrong and seek to learn more.

-“Carefree Life”

-Learn as much as possible, NEVER ignore, the more knowledge/information you have at your disposal (whether the info is true or false) the more truth you have and the more ready you are.

-“Accept Opinions” If you dont like something, it is because you dont understand it.

So do not even reject ideas from yourself, have consideration for any input you get from anybody, even from yourself, do not reject any ideas for the sake of another.  But be open to anything, and accept wherever you witness integrity.  But do not judge things by their cover, look into them and search the truth in them.

Addressing Conditions

File Location:  My Words/Completion (What we know)\Achieving Awareness\Methodology\Explore\Open Mind/Addressing Conditions

There is a pen, on the ground, what happens if I reach for it, then I clasp my fingers around it, and lift?  The result is, I pick up the pen... right?  Yes but there are things that we usually ignore to address because we consider them constant.  Within the intructions of how to pick up a pen (or anything) you can NEVER be too exact, there is always something that you need to address.  So how do you pick up a pen?  You reach down and clasp around it and lift.  The things that I forget or disregard to address are called assumptions, like: it is necessary ffor me to have a physical body, for the pen to not be imaginary, For you to reach down for it with your body and not with your mental hand. 

All infinite number of things may be addressed, even the things that seem to have no connection, or  that have no effect.  Like would it still work if the sky was pink?  This seems like it wouldnt matter, the rest of the laws of nature would be the same right?  Even then the chemical atmosphere that are needed to make the sky turn pink may affect the friction of your fingers of your physica body so that you cannot clasp hhard enough to lift your hand with the pen stuck to your fingers, so you would have to reach under it somehow. The instructions are different because you need different conditions in order to reproduce and manifest a desired effect.

Remember the Unknown, just because something works does not mean it is the only thing that works, just because something seems to work does not mean it will always work.  Because Reality is so infinite that each moment is completely different that not even a memory can reproduce the exactness of a moment will never again be manifested the same, it will ever stay in the place, and time where it happened unique frame, individual infinite. 

 So when something happens and we want to reproduce the conditions in order to manifest tthe same effect, but it will never be as exact as it was because of the time that it happened in. When I was in kindergarden, I would tell my brother that he couldnt do exactly as I did. I would do something and challenge him, he would do it. But there are details about me that he cant reproduce, he couldnt makehis face look like mineI would tell him, and to do exactly as I did he would have to be in the same spot as I was and done it at the same time I did.  So he could not reproduce my exact action.  He could only form a similar representation.  But it would never be the original action.

And possibilities Our goal is to be aware of as much as possible right?

And when we are studying how to reproduce an event we must take into consideration as much as possible.  If you got a girlfriend, and you wonder how it happened you must cnosider as much as possible, and think of all the conditions that made the event possible, and also you should wonder what the event REALLY was.  How were you feeling? (how you feel can have an afect on the outside world, the fermones you release, the emotions you express)  How was the sky? ( was it daytime night time, was it aa rainy day when no one is outside)  Where there any kittens around? (you never know you might as well write this down, its about being aware of as many things as possible, keep an open mind and accept that there may be a possibilty of how something that seems stupid and unconnected may have a very real effect).  What did you do that daY? (maybe something you did caused chain reaction) What did your friends do? What did other people do? What were they thinking? What made them think that? (it could have  been what they ate that they) and give me more and more questions because it really never ends...  what you ate the day before, (you know this can have an effect)  be aware, and dont ignore it, but  have an open mind and try to figure out ways that anything can be true, and of how these conditions bring about such result) Always, always, there is always unknown an pray, pray to Unknown about these things, for blessings, because he knows all.

And when you have conditions, you should also look at and exercise looking at possibilities.

What if:

Or

What would be the result of such and such? (such question type would also include the initial conditions that you have figured out yourself... What if the sky is blue, it is daytime, I am physical, the pen is physical, [all these conditions you should be aware of as you expect something to result from it, if you fail to address all the conditions then there will certainly be a possibility of getting your prediction wrong, and since you “cannot” behold all possible conditions in existence that would result in an event then you always have the possibility of having a wrong prediction.])  what if: (all the conditions you can address from an observed result), then it should result in what you are observing.. right?... wrong! Because there is still Unknown)

September 11, 2009

Music class again, a girl sits beside me, we both got here early this time, only me and her, “were here early”, she said, as she noticed we weer the only ones in class.  There was no one else so I talked, I asked her if she knew how the quiz was going to be like, she told me,her voice was deep type, she gave off a psychotic look, like the kind that makes you think of someone insane. I asked her if she was a music major, she said maybe. Usually, undecided students are first or second year, I asked her what year she was, sophomore, but she took a year off.  She  said maybe she wanted  to major in studio art, drawing charcoal etc.   I thought I shouldnt mind the look she gave off, its the same look I would give too a stranger if I was at a place like whitman,  She wrote a name, big letters in her notebook, Joe Wheeler, I wanted to ask her about it, she probably wanted me to notice it. She draws, flowers and an elephant, which I expect to forget.  I think she is beautiful.  I have always done this since I was in preschool, since I remember, I just like girls.

I remember I had a conversation with Crystal about being at whitman, I told her that I wasnt where I wanted to be, I told her that I wanted to get away, and now in another state I  wasnt satisfied, even though I was somewhere else in the eyes of others, to me I was still “here”.  And how could I get out of “here”? I would have to get out of myself, out of my mind? I would have to be somewhere that I am not.  I thought about it, and realized I was always where I was, and where I wanted to go, was somewhere I wasnt.  After a while, I learned to appreciate things in such this way.  I thought of it as all being in my head. I hhad to give myself impressions to make myself feel as if I was somewhere else, I had to look at myself with the eyes of me not here, then I would feel like if I  was somewhere where I wasnt.  Then after I had the problem with whitman college and after all the emotion, I realized that this was just what I wanted, somewhere where I would have problems, somewhere different, this is what I was after something new, something to learn, and this is why I want to stay at whitman, because its just what I wanted, God help me.  Now today I realize I dont just admit the general but I see witth more detail that I am indeed somewhere else, after I have also felt good about being around people that dont want me around, even after this I see something new to appreciate, that back then, when I wished to be somewhere else and did not feel somewhere else, even though it felt like I would be lying to myself to tell me that I have finally escaped, I realize now that I would feel escaped only after I admitted the truth to myself; just what I thought would be a lie.

September 10, 2009

I am in music history class, there is a girl sitting at my right, she has short black hair, eye shadow, and smells like spearmint, she is chewing gum today, I wonder of she is planning to kiss me.  Brown eyes, I like to look at her.  Chipped nail polish on her fingernails,  black, with her purple lead pencil she writes a name, “Eliza” ... “Music”? “History”... Then she writes, Eliza Young. When I got back to my room I looked her up, she lives on my flor. Eeeeeeeeee!!!

About 2 days before yesterady, I was in my philosophy class andv as I walked from it (I sent a txt message to my ex about this) I wnodered about those feeling I ever had, that made me go crazy, those thoughts, I realized that, it was things that I shold be doing, worlds I should be expressing with my being. Yesterday in class Proff Tom Davis mentioned the emotions one has when they are babies that they dont have the words to express, it is a really painful experience so they forget. I told him that it was not the case with me, I had memories from like 1 or 2 years old, and I can remember recognizing the emotion even though I didnt really know how to say it.   And so he must have been talking about the feelings I get when I go crazy, but I go crazy, not because I cant express it, but because I feel a strong “duty” to express it, and I am not doing it.

There is this girl with a nose ring, in my philosophy 201 class, its 2:38, Im not sure of her name, she has a green shirt religious “coexist” and drinks water out of a blue crayon, the way she looks at me,  it makes me wonder, the look she gives, its kind of sexual, well thats howit makes me feel, I wonder I knew what her mind was like.  I used to catch her looking at me, I wonder what it means, she stares at me as much as I stare at her, we take turns though, I wish I knew what to do to make it so she doesnt get tired of looking at me.. how would I control this part? Or how could I move forward.  What do I do?  All I can do or should do is be myself, display myself, show bits of who I am.  And i should be aware  of this, even when I think no one is watching, this makes another rule that in all times, I live, I live by making others aware of my consciousness, or express myself and what is insiide me, my truth, my thoughts, who I am, display and not hde, at all times/

Senses

File Location:  My Words/Completion (What we know)\Achieving Awareness/Senses

Make people aware of their senses, When you awake their senses, and some, they should pay attention to those senses, and should be more aware of alot of things.  Play with their senses, so that they realize and remember that they have them.

Use all senses you can find.

Smell:

Touch:

·         Pain

·         Pleasure

·         Pressure

·         Strange

When you stimulate a sense, you either accept or reject it, strong touch senses are usually rejected and seen as pain, but if you accept it, you will realize that it is only a strong stimulation, to awaken your senses.  If you reject it, you are rejecting your awakening, you are rejecting awareness and you are rejecting life,  when you reject what makes you feel as much as we reject life when we are in pain, we dont want to live, we cowar away from living, from feeling.

Sight:

Taste:

Sound:

Time:

Emotions: